Sobriety Survival101

Twelve Step meetings seem to be a gathering place for the truly wise. We can’t be sure at first what it is these people have, but we know we want it too. Attending meetings, reading Twelve Step literature, and choosing a sponsor who has a program we admire will change how we think and live daily. We’ll learn, as our sponsors have learned before us, to keep our focus on the little things we can improve. We’ll learn, as they have, to let go of others, letting God be in charge. We’ll learn, as they have, to live just for today. And then we’ll realize that we are beginning to have what these wise people have. By following their example, we’ll begin to appear wise, peaceful, and hopeful to newcomers. All of us can attain this quality if we really want it. Today I can be as wise as the ones I admire. I now have a blueprint to follow. I’ll start by keeping my focus small and my thinking simple.

Describe incidents where you expressed inappropriate anger towards other people.    Describe times that you have withdrawn from social interaction and isolated yourself to an extreme degree and why. Describe embarrassing or humiliating incidents in your life. Were they related to your addictive behaviors? If so, how were they related?   Have you avoided people because they did not share in or approve of your addictive behavior? If so, list these people and situations. ·       Describe attempts that you have made in the past to control your addictive behaviors.How successful have they been? Do these attempts show the powerlessness that you have over your addictive behaviors? Step One We admitted we were powerless over marijuana and that our lives had become unmanageable. [p. 5] With the First Step we begin the recovery process. Working this step enables us to move forward through the Twelve Steps of Marijuana Anonymous. We may now find it useful to carefully examine some of our old beli

Day 64: Learn to Sleep Naturally Sleep medications aren’t necessarily the solution to sleep problems. Some medications can be addictive. For a natural alternative, try avoiding caffeine after 10:00 a.m. and try not to nap during the day. Save your bedroom for sleeping—avoid the urge to read, write, or watch television in your bedroom. This will help condition your mind that the bedroom equals sleep. You can also try exercising about four hours before bedtime and taking a hot bath right before you go to sleep. Using relaxing rituals, such as meditating or listening to music, before bedtime can help mellow your mind and body. Don’t stay in bed when you have trouble sleeping. Get up and do something relaxing such as stretching or meditating, and don’t go back to bed until you feel sleepy. A ction for the Day If you are having trouble sleeping, review your thoughts, activities, and what you’ve eaten that might be interfering with your sleep. Are you worrying about something from the past o

Making mental connections is our most crucial learning tool … to see patterns, relationships, context. —Marilyn Ferguson One day, on the famous “bullet train” from Kyoto to Tokyo, passengers rushed to one side of the train just in time to see thick clouds suddenly part, revealing the beauty of Mount Fuji. They exclaimed with excitement and took pictures until, just as suddenly, the clouds once again hid the mountain. The incident affected the rest of the journey. People who had been strangers started talking to one another, more aware of all around them. Those who had been sleeping awakened and watched the scenery pass by as the train sped to its destination. Those passengers shared a common connection that brought them unity. The same is true in your recovery. You are an essential part of every meeting you attend. The story you bring to others is a story with which they are familiar. The thoughts and feelings you have resonate with them. Every time you share your thoughts and feelings

I find it helpful especially if you're a beginner- to start by visualizing and environments of happiness and love.for example I think of myself at a spa getting a massage. As though lying on a sunlit beach, let us relax and breathe deeply of the spiritual atmosphere....   1. Relax the body : ~Sit quietly and comfortably, letting the body arrive here in this place.  ~Close your eyes, deeply relax all of your muscles from your feet up to your face. ~Let all body sensations come and let them go. Feel your natural body embody you.   2. Relax the breath: ~Take three deep breaths, then let the breath be here. ~You may breathe through your nose. As you inhale, feel the cool of the air on your nostrils. Sense the sharpness in the back of your throat. As you exhale, note the softness as you follow the breath all the way out. You may repeat a word or phrase or prayer silently on each out-breath.    For example some repeat, “Ah well…. Ah well…. Ah well….”   3. Relax the mind: ~ Let the though

SIX ESSENTIAL CHARACTERISTICS OF ALCOHOLISM, AND OTHER ADDICTIONS  The following is to be used as part of our First Step. The idea is to help raise our “bottom”, in other words to help break down our denial. We want to increase our awareness of the dynamics of our problem and to increase the pain of holding on to it. Skip 1. Allergy, if the area you are working on is an area other than a form of chemical addiction.  1. ALLERGY - The phenomena of physical craving that kicks in with the first drink of alcohol, slice of cake, pill or any drug, etc. This craving is limited to those with a chemical addiction. STATE YOUR TRIGGER FOOD OR DRUG.  2. PROGRESSIVE - Tolerance: takes more to get the job done. With non-substance addictions it takes more money, sex, work, etc. STATE HOW YOU EXPERIENCE THIS PROGRESSION.  3. SELF-DELUSION - Starts with denial, then repression, and then mind games, rationalizing, then comes the conscious lying. The rationalizing and consciously lying really do a job on

In our disease defense system we build up huge walls to protect ourselves and then - as soon as we meet someone who will help us to repeat our patterns of abuse, abandonment, betrayal, and/or deprivation - we lower the drawbridge and invite them in.  We, in our Codependence, have radar systems which cause us to be attracted to, and attract to us, the people, who for us personally, are exactly the most untrustworthy (or unavailable or smothering or abusive or whatever we need to repeat our patterns) individuals - exactly the ones who will "push our buttons."  This happens because those people feel familiar.  Unfortunately in childhood the people whom we trusted the most - were the most familiar - hurt us the most.  So the effect is that we keep repeating our patterns and being given the reminder that it is not safe to trust ourselves or other people. Once we begin healing we can see that the Truth is that it is not safe to trust as long as we are reacting out of the emoti

Spiritual Backpack In 2002, at 20 years sober, as part of my decision to start working the program on a daily basis, I started carrying around a spiritual backpack with me. I find that reading with a highlighter and pen makes all the difference in the world. I first make sure to highlight whatever I read that is meaningful, being careful not to select the entire page. After reading & highlighting, I write a maximum of five words at the top in block letters to summarize what the page is about. I try to limit my reading of each book to between one paragraph and one page, as I have a lot of books I read each day, and don’t want to rush the process by reading many pages. However, sometimes I can’t help myself :) Okay, here they are… BIG BOOK OF AA (ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS) Published in 1939 and written by Bill W. and 31 other members of AA. I read this every day I do my daily rituals, which currently is about 350 days/year (what can I say, I’m not perfect!). I carry the poc

“Sanskrit Proverb Look to this day, For it is life, The very life of life. In its brief course lies all The realities and verities of existence, The bliss of growth, The splendor of action, The glory of power. For yesterday is but a dream, And tomorrow is only a vision. But today, well lived, Makes every yesterday a dream of happiness And every tomorrow a vision of hope. Look well, therefore, to this day.”  

These slogans are often practiced in Twelve Step groups: “One day at a time” reminds you that recovery is a journey taken one step at a time. “First things first” means your first commitment must be sobriety. “Easy does it” reminds you to avoid taking on too much, especially during early recovery. “Live and let live” means mind your own business. Focus on living your life and try not to control someone else or judge their progress. “Let go and let God” means when you’ve done all you can do, ask your Higher Power to help do the rest. “Accept life on life’s terms” means to embrace life as it is, with all its imperfections. “Progress, not perfection” reminds you that recovery is a journey, not a destination, and that every step forward is success. “This, too, shall pass” is another way of saying only change is permanent. “Turn it over” means letting your Higher Power guide you. “Go with the flow” is practicing acceptance. “Keep it simple” reminds you not to get distracted by unimportant t

Life happens and with that preparing for such includes relapse prevention plans. Choose 3-5 people to call in case of emergency or cravings occur. Write a favorite quote to motivate you suing distressing times.  Remember that feelings pass and your not alone.  Even though you’ve planned your day to avoid sticky situations, there will be some you can’t avoid. For example, you may be required to attend a work event where alcoholic beverages will be served. Or perhaps your in an unexpected situation where your offered drugs. If you can’t avoid a sticky situation, use these coping strategies: Ask a supportive sober friend to go with you. Talk with your sponsor and come up with a plan to deal with the situation. Make an agreement with yourself that you will leave the event early if you sense any warning signs of a relapse. Make sure you have arranged a safe ride home in case you need to leave the event early. A ction for the Day Think about any sticky situations that you may have to face in

“I accept that the life I have known is over. I move into a new and blessed phase of my time here. I accept pain as my teacher, and problems as the key to a new existence for me. I seek guides in my life and understand that they may be different than I anticipate. I accept the messages surrounding me. Negativity is replaced with positive acceptance. I realize that I have had a hard life and that I deserve better. I let the Spirit melt the hardness of my heart. I comfort and nurture myself. As part of the surrender of my pride I will let” Excerpt From: Carnes, Patrick. “A Gentle Path through the Twelve Steps.” Hazelden, 2012.